Saturday, May 15, 2010

good lord

They were freshmen.


I am currently in boston. At harvard square. At a "party". With undergrads. Who just finished their year. Maybe a SWF sophmore just invaded my personal space and her warm leg in scant sun skirt is touching me rudely.

Elshadey said it was just like wesleyan, but without the weed.

The crowd is rocking cross colors clothes, goodwill sports coats, and sundresses with messy hair. No visible white dreads.

College band is playing last show of the year. SWF is bitter she's not hooking up on last night out. Her happa cute sidekick is clearly hooking up with shaggy headed white boy with jewelery ignoring her to her right. Don't they have a tent party here?

I'm not ready.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

On to the Next One


not but a hot minute ago I was in a place with bears and fish. and, as a general rule, not many people. there were three bus lines. and three busses. two grocery stores. one movie theatre.

and walking up the franklin ave. subway with one lady's big bag pushing on my hip and face-to-butt up the stairs with 7 people within three feet of me it struck me as a year of extremes. it wasn't a fair, festival, line for shopping after thanksgiving. it was just a normal rush hour commute home.

i think there's more people in this neighborhood than in all of my town in alaska.

just looked it up.

clinton hill: 46,000
ketchikan, ak: 7,000

PHAT follow up:

Clearly sandwiches were phat.

D = fat moon

K = fat elvis

Both = no dinner required

Photos were taken. Of ordering. Of eating. Of the small birds that stalked us whilst eating.

Phat ass success.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


Were going to get FAT sandwiches in new brunswick. For all you californians who've been living under a rock:

The fat sandwich (noun)- a HUGE sandwich. Hoagie roll. Toppings include any "regular" sandwich PLUS chicken fingers, hot dogs, french fries, etc. Kirstie Alley ate one of these and that's why she so fat (this time).

Well report back on the results and our consequent plans for lipo.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Adios Durham, here comes Chocolate City... kinda

so so so

last night, for good times sake we partied like it was 2004. When livers were practically virgin and you'd drink anything including straight vermouth. And, much like the setting of my 21st year of life, there were hipsters, bohos, and too cool for school chris lake all partying it up whilst the dj spun in a poorly lit red room a la ecclectic. hill and i think we saw this girl. lauren. lauren something. she was duck footed and sporty. a foreshadowing of all the wesleyan to come, to be sure.

we did also unearth a new pickup line: "Apocalypse!"

said with enough conviction, it may inspire girls to talk to you, inquiring whether this is indeed their last chance to... well... people this is a family blog. A special thanks to Jeff for road-testing this one. Sorry you didn't get DJ girl. There are some great photos documenting the attempt however.

happy to say i do not have the 2010 hangover, so plans are still on to migrate north. north to freedom. but instead of an actual owner i'm gaining freedom from pollen. it's pretty thick down here.

literally. we went swimming in a lake. i thought the top was kinda dirty. NO. it was just a sheen of pollen. whoa. i'm bff's with claratin, but it didn't even do the trick.

and while our hosts have been overly accommodating, it is time to move on from our fabulous respite. dc, or alexandria and baltimore to be exact.

more later. this post goes out to RTeezey. you are my muse.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Sadly no Ruby

After a lovely night in St. Augustine with our wonderful new friends Dian and Ana who we met on our travels in Thailand we left this morning due North to the land of Ruby!

We had an excessive lunch at Paula Deen's restaurant Lady & Sons where Danielle sat back to back with what we are pretty sure was one of her sons going somewhat incognito. There was blackberry googling and, while inconclusive, we have convinced ourselves it was. The fried green tomatoes were fantastic and each of our meals was delicious and ridiculous. Just know if you go there that when you order fries that in fact means a slice of potato boiled, breaded and fried....what!?!

After our gluttonous meal we waddled out and about for a bit hoping to run into Ruby, but sadly no Ruby.

We then continued our journey up into South Carolina to Charleston where we have reserved a bed in their hostel here in town. Very cute and I'm currently writing this post from the second floor porch - wireless is wonderful. Resting before possibly attending an open mic event tonight somewhere in town....

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Forgive us

Forgive us for not posting more. We are 11 days in to our 40 day road trip...yup it's that long, and currently in Tamarac, FL. Lots has happened since our last post.

New Orleans: Fantastic! We got in on last Friday night after a stop in Montgomery, AL through some of the heaviest rainstorms either of us had ever seen. Our fun-packed weekend with Hillary and Christie involved multiple visits to Cafe Du Monde for beignets, sight-seeing, Jazz Fest, afternoon drinking of Hurricanes in the French Quarter, a few crushes and some delicious food! (also some less than medium food at Cochon - so disappointing)

Next stop Tallahassee on the way to Orlando: We are both fans of La Quintas because they so rarely steer us wrong - except in Tallahassee. This hotel was where we landed for the night after shopping around the many hotels at that exit, and we thought we could risk it. Medium. There was the creepy other guests, the wrong room keys from the completely dead pan front desk clerk, and the dead pigeon in the middle of the pathway. We quickly locked the door, hopped in our sleepsheets (beds were questionable) and tucked in til the morning.

Orlando: Sort of. This is our first stop using D's vouchers so we were somewhat skeptical upon arrival. We got to the Orlando Welcome Center to check in and received the tickets to Universal Studios and Arabian Nights! This hotel was a few steps better than the La Quinta but had we traveled back in time to the 80s this hotel would have been amazing. The center of the hotel is a giant space the height of the hotel with murals all around, beach scape murals. Also included in this central space, a pizza hut, a recessed seating area with Karaoke nightly, the saddest buffet restaurant ever, and a pool with a "waterfall" and that is in quotes because it was a pipe with holes poked in it. I'm sure there will be some pictures up shortly.

Our full day in Orlando was Universal Studios - Islands of Adventure where we promptly rode all the rollercoasters. Spiderman was the best, Hillary was right. Then we participated in a TV show viewing where we made $15 each - we totally win. Maybe the only people to go to an amusement park and actually make money.

But the day wasn't done yet, not by far. We had tickets to a dinner show - Arabian Nights! This is a show that has a Bedoin girl who is actually an Arabian princess and has been kept safe from the villain by her fathers genie. Then throughout the show the genie proceeded to inform the princess about gypsies, cowboys, indians, unicorns, and torreadors all on horseback! Everything that you are imagining happened and was crazier than you think! Plus dinner! Yup!

Fort Lauderdale: Again, sort of. We are actually in Tamarac, FL outside of Fort Lauderdale a trick of these voucher stays. This hotel is definitely a couple steps up from the Orlando stay and we get every meal comped! It feels like we're back at a dorm and getting three meals a day - love it!

When we got in D was having a shopping craving so we got directions from the front desk and headed for the nearest Ross and Old Navy! We made it to the shopping area but didn't get past the Dot's!!! For those of you who went to school with D you are very aware of Dot's and the excitement that it caused us both to find this store. For those of you who don't know it's like Rainbow at it's very best! We did not make it to Ross or Old Navy and each bought more things to somehow fit in our bags...anyone shocked?

Today we went into the Everglades!! To get there you drive on a highway called Alligator Alley. There was Billie Swamp Safari on the Seminole reservation in the middle of the Everglades. We got the airboat tour and the swamp buggy. Around the camp there were alligators and tortoises and snakes. The airboat tour was great and we saw two alligators probably about 12 feet long each, also raccoons, ostrich, wild boar and cranes. Then we took the swamp buggy which went along an old canoe path that the Seminole used to use to escape the soldiers all around the reserve. K did not conquer her fear of alligators but did go and see them anyway.

On our way back we stopped at an Art & Music festival on the reservation and got amazingly delicious Indian Tacos and watched a traditional dress fashion show. The heat started to overwhelm us so we headed back to our hotel for our free dinner and a swim in the pool!

Now it's time to get back to watching School of Rock and get ready for our drive up to St. Augustine, FL tomorrow to stay with our friends we met in Thailand.