Saturday, May 15, 2010

good lord

They were freshmen.


I am currently in boston. At harvard square. At a "party". With undergrads. Who just finished their year. Maybe a SWF sophmore just invaded my personal space and her warm leg in scant sun skirt is touching me rudely.

Elshadey said it was just like wesleyan, but without the weed.

The crowd is rocking cross colors clothes, goodwill sports coats, and sundresses with messy hair. No visible white dreads.

College band is playing last show of the year. SWF is bitter she's not hooking up on last night out. Her happa cute sidekick is clearly hooking up with shaggy headed white boy with jewelery ignoring her to her right. Don't they have a tent party here?

I'm not ready.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

On to the Next One


not but a hot minute ago I was in a place with bears and fish. and, as a general rule, not many people. there were three bus lines. and three busses. two grocery stores. one movie theatre.

and walking up the franklin ave. subway with one lady's big bag pushing on my hip and face-to-butt up the stairs with 7 people within three feet of me it struck me as a year of extremes. it wasn't a fair, festival, line for shopping after thanksgiving. it was just a normal rush hour commute home.

i think there's more people in this neighborhood than in all of my town in alaska.

just looked it up.

clinton hill: 46,000
ketchikan, ak: 7,000

PHAT follow up:

Clearly sandwiches were phat.

D = fat moon

K = fat elvis

Both = no dinner required

Photos were taken. Of ordering. Of eating. Of the small birds that stalked us whilst eating.

Phat ass success.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


Were going to get FAT sandwiches in new brunswick. For all you californians who've been living under a rock:

The fat sandwich (noun)- a HUGE sandwich. Hoagie roll. Toppings include any "regular" sandwich PLUS chicken fingers, hot dogs, french fries, etc. Kirstie Alley ate one of these and that's why she so fat (this time).

Well report back on the results and our consequent plans for lipo.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Adios Durham, here comes Chocolate City... kinda

so so so

last night, for good times sake we partied like it was 2004. When livers were practically virgin and you'd drink anything including straight vermouth. And, much like the setting of my 21st year of life, there were hipsters, bohos, and too cool for school chris lake all partying it up whilst the dj spun in a poorly lit red room a la ecclectic. hill and i think we saw this girl. lauren. lauren something. she was duck footed and sporty. a foreshadowing of all the wesleyan to come, to be sure.

we did also unearth a new pickup line: "Apocalypse!"

said with enough conviction, it may inspire girls to talk to you, inquiring whether this is indeed their last chance to... well... people this is a family blog. A special thanks to Jeff for road-testing this one. Sorry you didn't get DJ girl. There are some great photos documenting the attempt however.

happy to say i do not have the 2010 hangover, so plans are still on to migrate north. north to freedom. but instead of an actual owner i'm gaining freedom from pollen. it's pretty thick down here.

literally. we went swimming in a lake. i thought the top was kinda dirty. NO. it was just a sheen of pollen. whoa. i'm bff's with claratin, but it didn't even do the trick.

and while our hosts have been overly accommodating, it is time to move on from our fabulous respite. dc, or alexandria and baltimore to be exact.

more later. this post goes out to RTeezey. you are my muse.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Sadly no Ruby

After a lovely night in St. Augustine with our wonderful new friends Dian and Ana who we met on our travels in Thailand we left this morning due North to the land of Ruby!

We had an excessive lunch at Paula Deen's restaurant Lady & Sons where Danielle sat back to back with what we are pretty sure was one of her sons going somewhat incognito. There was blackberry googling and, while inconclusive, we have convinced ourselves it was. The fried green tomatoes were fantastic and each of our meals was delicious and ridiculous. Just know if you go there that when you order fries that in fact means a slice of potato boiled, breaded and fried....what!?!

After our gluttonous meal we waddled out and about for a bit hoping to run into Ruby, but sadly no Ruby.

We then continued our journey up into South Carolina to Charleston where we have reserved a bed in their hostel here in town. Very cute and I'm currently writing this post from the second floor porch - wireless is wonderful. Resting before possibly attending an open mic event tonight somewhere in town....